If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us” (1 John 1:8 NIV
The nations are all the other countries in the bible besides Isreal. Assyria, Babylon, Cannan, Roman Empire. Godless and sinful, without morals. God set up for us to live in fellowship in a garden but the sin to be our own God got us kicked out. Then there was family and men as leaders of their families/tribes. Then a temple for cental location for communing with God with leaders of priest, prophets and judges; but the people felt weak and wanted a king like the nations. God warned them against this and spoke to them through his profets, but as they say in What’s in the Bible the children of Isreal went through cycle after cycle of “repent, repent, snooze. ” Which got them all destroyed save a remnant. My favorite word.
I sin like the nation of Isreal. I put other people as higher authority than the Lord my God. I’ll be busy loving others instead of keeping my eyes fixed on Jesus. It causes me to care what they think, trying to please them. Then, I become a slave to them. Galatians 1:10
am I now seeking the favor of men, or of God? or am I striving to please men? if I were still pleasing men, I should not be a servant of Christ.
God had to teach me the hard way not to keep my focus on trying to be pleasing to other women. My mom passed down this sin of wanting the favor of other women of the church. They are not God. Some people will never give you approval. They will have you seeking after their approval for as long as I will stumble, forsaking myself trying to receive it. At best it puts pressure on people to be perfect instead of real and authentic which is where fellowship occurs. At worst I became a slave to approval. Seeking approval to man makes me a reproach to God and he loves me too much to leave me like that.
I would relate this misguided seeking to the scene in Lost Boys 1987 (a vampire movie) where Edward Herrmann’s character says: “Dont ever invite a vampire into your home, you silly boy, it renders you powerless. ” Lesson for Life- don’t give your power over to other people. Sounds like a lesson from an Oprah show. My pastor Dr Mercer once said in a sermon “Jesus is the only person in your life, who can govern your life, without enslaving you.” I know that’s true.
When I was a kid, my best friend down the street was perfect. She was pretty, stylish, had the best toys, lots of friends, her mom adored her, she never got in trouble she was always well put together. I wanted to copy everything she did, just like her little sister. She hated it. I on the other hand was “helter skelter” as my Uncle called me. I talked to much and listened to little. I didn’t sit still. Sometimes I didn’t match. I was often unprepared, disorganized, didn’t complete tasks, but I sure was happy when I was outside. I’m still happiest when I’m outside. I’m so thankful it brings me joy, I needed it like crazy when I was grieving.
Romans 8:28 NASB1995[28] And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.
Psalms 20:7-8 NASB1995[7] Some boast in chariots and some in horses, But we will boast in the name of the Lord, our God. [8] They have bowed down and fallen, But we have risen and stood upright.
It’s interesting that trust is used instead of boast in some versions. We boast about what we trust in. I would boast about and praise my friends, because I thought they were so great and what I would put my trust in to help me through life. God is a jealous God and he wants my trust, praise and hope. When I continued to want my friends to govern my life. God would let the evil nations over take me. When studying the old testament with Precept they say what is true of ancient Isreal physically is true of us spiritually. My first conquering as consequence for my idolatry was when I started middle school. There was a girl in my class who was smart, she was comfortable speaking in front of the class she was pretty and very cool. I wanted to be her friend. Luke 22:31-32 NASB1995[31] “Simon, Simon, behold, Satan has demanded permission to sift you like wheat; [32] but I have prayed for you, that your faith may not fail; and you, when once you have turned again, strengthen your brothers.” As Beth Moore said in one of her books I read when she released her books on digital access for free – Jesus let Satan sift Peter because Peter had something that needed sifting! We’ll, God was going to use this first Jezable spirt to sift out my idolatry of approval of other women.
Since I was a Christian I did want to know if she was a Christian. She had Father Abraham answers that her grandmother was a Christian. She would come to church with me, bible camp and even got baptized at my church. She never did develop spital fruits. 2 Corinthians 11:13-15 NASB1995[13] For such men are false apostles, deceitful workers, disguising themselves as apostles of Christ. [14] No wonder, for even Satan disguises himself as an angel of light. [15] Therefore it is not surprising if his servants also disguise themselves as servants of righteousness, whose end will be according to their deeds. When I came to her house one day her mom laughed that I thought she wanted to be baptized because she was a believer. I was sad to realize she hadn’t. I put up with all kinds of abuse from her for years because I had thought she was someone she wasn’t, I thought she was wanting to grow and better herself, I had put so much of myself into the relationship and being her friend was part of my identity. I had to learn to find my identity in Christ. I hadn’t learned from my childhood, Christian friend so God got a bigger stone to throw.
The first time Jezable 1 came to my house we were playing in my room and she shares that she did this really horrible thing. She feels terrible about it and she trusts me enough to share it with me. She doesn’t share it with anyone else. I was so concerned for her and so glad she could trust me to be able to share with someone. She gets angry. One day her older brother was making her so angry she got a knife and chased him with it. In later years what she actually did was immensely worse. When she was done with her dramatization she said now you have to tell me something you are ashamed of since I shared with you something so shameful about me. I immediately had one thing come to mind that thought of when I thought of shame. It wasn’t something I did so I didn’t want to share, but she acted like I was harming her if I didn’t. I shared with her my dad was falsely arrested and questioned about a report a young girl in our neighborhood was flashed. Which I know he didn’t do since it goes against his character. She then went around telling people my dad is a pedophile. My church baptized her.
As Jezables do she accused me of everything and the kitchen sink in the years I knew her. That I wasn’t smart (because I would be pulled for SLD when in elementary school.) That I was a lesbian (she had sex before 14) and I never had a boyfriend for more than a week until I met my husband. Then, a pedophile or rapist. Seriously. I’m not a highly sexual person. I’m not a physical person. I’m not mean or harmful. I don’t have any perverse or unnatural sexual attractions. I barely had any interest. She obsessed about it. Having a boyfriend and guys wanting her was important. I didn’t want that kind of attention. She eventually would turn other people against me triangulation so people would be on her side. That I was judging and harming her because I wasn’t sexually active. Guys eat this one up. Have you ever seen guys wear clothing that says “thanks for being a slut”? It uses language a woman would use for another woman, but the man is showing appreciation for getting to take advantage of her promiscuity. Which was probably caused initially by a man who violated her when she was young. By Senior year of high school she would barely speak to me. I was going with my parents to New Orleans to visit my brother in college. I was sharing the exciting news with her and she suggests I go to a palm or terrot reader. I said no way. Im not interested. I was taught well by my second mom. Besides there is no way my parents would allow me even if I wanted to. However, she persisted tempting with the image of finding cool jewelry like Phoebe Buffet in Friends. The spiritual world and battle is real and I experienced it myself in New Orleans. My mom and I were shopping around in the French Quarter and I noticed a terrot shop. It had a narrow wood staircase with a jewelry stand at the top of the stairs and the door was open. I thought wow they really do sell jewelry. Its outside on the stairs what can be the harm in looking for a cool find? As I approach, drawn to it, a lady appeared which made me weary stop walking so she said come in, look at the jewelry like your friend said. I stopped short in terror! The hair on the back of my neck stood up and I became aware of the influence. It got my mom’s attention and she yelled out my name and hurried over to me to pull me away. I said to my mom she was expecting me. My mom said yes, evil is real. Why were you going in there? I explained the jewelry and she said you don’t want that jewelry. I said no I don’t. When Jezable 1 stopped talking to me it was because she and our other 2 best friends with some guys were planning to drive to a town about 45 minutes away where the whole town is full of palm readers, terrot and witch craft. People say it’s spooky as soon as you arrive and so teenagers like to go for mischief. I didn’t want to go. Even though I have a FOMO I was taught to stay away from that stuff because evil is real. The Bible says so too. She said it was fun and spooky and eventually it got scary and the police told them to leave. She told me that the crystal ball reader told her that she had a Christian friend who would harm her. I got so upset that she would believe that over knowing me all the years. She stopped talking to me to really drive the point and be cruel. It broke my heart.
I met my husband, she wanted him to want her, he did. She beautiful, sexual and had huge boob. She had sex with him. In my wedding video there is footage of her following him around to get close to him. He is aware of the camera. I didn’t want to believe it. Of either of them. I rationalized she wouldn’t want to have sex with him. She can do way better. When I first met him she was saying she didn’t want to be friends if that was the kind of guy I wanted to be with. He was short, overweight, and had a GED. I went to workout at the gym with her one day since she had been asking and afterwards we went for a run and saw him at a construction site working. He called out and I was excited to see him. She kept going and so i stayed with her. He got in his dump truck and drove up to us. She dissed him and I got in. Later she went around saying i got into a dump truck with some guy. Eventually, she said she that the reason she was luring him is because one of our besties wanted the attention of her boyfriend. Oh, ok then. They did that to me because they both like to betray. It wasn’t their first time or last. Those separated from God and sexual immortality always go together. My job was to believe people when they show and tell me who they are the first time. While attending community College we were at her parents who were out of town and she had a camera set up in her room and asked if I wanted a threesome with her boyfriend. I said no. Why would you ask me that? Asked myself why I was there? Left unbelonging where I had invested so much time.
When we were getting married she asked to be my maid of honor. I was struggling who to ask since I wasn’t close to anyone anymore so it was a relief to have that decision made. When getting ready she talked me into buying a veil I had to wear my hair up with because she knew how important it was to me to wear it down. I never wear my hair up because I don’t like my ears. I hate I was able to be talked into something I didn’t want because I trusted her style. When getting ready for my wedding I asked why her hair wasn’t up and she said I don’t want to look better than you and take attention from you on your day. When I walked out of the room she closed the door on my veil and my cousin’s boyfriend had to help release me. When we got to the chapel she told me my husband didn’t want to come since he was late getting there. She threw her shoe at me when we were taking wedding photos because they were hurting her feet. A few years later when my first child was born I was in the hospital and checked my phone. I had a voice mail from her. She said I’m home sick today so I’ll just be here all day and available for you to call. No thank you. I was so tired of wanting goodness from someone who had none. Wanting all the love, time and attention to produce fruit, but I had to learn only Jesus can do that. Plus I had married someone just like her. Same spirit, different body. I have never spoken to her again. She sent a Facebook message after my husband died. She complained to a mutual friend after my mom died that I wasn’t responding to her condolence messages. I told the mutual friend that it’s very nice of her to send her condolences, but that I don’t have to respond. I haven’t spoken to her in 20 years and I wasn’t about to start now. Lesson for life: I’m weary of people who don’t want me to like someone because toxic people are divisive, triangulate and cause strife among friends.
It will take a half dozen more Jezables and a husband to sift me enough to learn to look up from the deceitful distractions and put my faith, hope, and TRUST in Jesus. To stop letting them govern my thoughts and desires and to stop being silent and start speaking the word of God. I learned a lot about Jezable from Jonathan Cahn. The spiritual influence of Jezable on Hilary Clinton and husband Ahab. Revelation 2:20-21 NASB1995[20] But I have this against you, that you tolerate the woman Jezebel, who calls herself a prophetess, and she teaches and leads My bond-servants astray so that they commit acts of immorality and eat things sacrificed to idols. [21] I gave her time to repent, and she does not want to repent of her immorality. The spirit of Jezable is the same whether it’s only the national stage. Or in the life of a minor prophet in a little town that’s insignificant to the national stage. Pastor Mark Driscoll has good teaching on this spirit as well.
A key word for me in a Bible study was UP. Such a small word with such a powerful effect when we keep our eyes upon Jesus.
Acts 10:26 NASB1995 [26] But Peter raised him up, saying, “Stand up; I too am just a man.”
Job 14:17 NASB1995 [17] My transgression is sealed up in a bag, And You wrap up my iniquity.
Psalms 147:3 NASB1995 [3] He heals the brokenhearted And binds up their wounds.
Deuteronomy 32:34 NASB1995 [34] ‘Is it not laid up in store with Me, Sealed up in My treasuries?
Isaiah 62:10 NASB1995 [10] Go through, go through the gates, Clear the way for the people; Build up, build up the highway, Remove the stones, lift up a standard over the peoples.
John 3:14 NASB1995 [14] As Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness, even so must the Son of Man be lifted up;
Luke 21:28 NASB1995 [28] But when these things begin to take place, straighten up and lift up your heads, because your redemption is drawing near.”
This brethren is where we are!